coexistence

[koh-ig-zist]

noun or verb (used without object)

1.	to exist together or at the same time.

2.	to exist separately or independently but peaceably, often while remaining rivals or adversaries: Although their ideologies differ greatly, the two great powers must coexist.

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One thing I’ve come to realize recently is that with all of humanity’s “great accomplishments” we have yet to really master the concept of coexistence. We can fly to the moon, we can create genetic clones in a test tube, we can vaccinate against AIDS, yet we cant seem to get the hang of simply living together. I sit here and I watch late night shows on discovery channel or whatever, and I see birds that mate and pair for life. regardless of what happens, those two will remain a bonded pair until they both die.

As of 2009, the current divorce rate in America is as follows:

Age Group	Women	Men
Under 20 years old	27.6%	11.7%
20 to 24 years old	36.6%	38.8%
25 to 29 years old	16.4%	22.3%
30 to 34 years old	8.5%	11.6%
35 to 39 years old	5.1%	6.5%

So you can see, that even if we do seem to think we have found this “endless love” we constantly search for, it just falls apart within a couple years anyway. Well, at least based on numbers. Hell, we cant live with each other, and based on the history of human civilization, we really can’t even have our countries next to each other. We are in an endless fight to be alone or be the sole entity, but at the same time in an endless search to never be alone. We just don’t make any fucking sense. That’s my conclusion.

To make any sense of this, I want to understand why it seems to be so difficult for humans to simply coexist. We think so highly of ourselves, yet we can’t do something that a miniscule ant or bee colony can accomplish without (literally) even thinking. Why is it that we have become so complex in our ways that we have lost touch with the very basic thing that brought us together? I mean, yeah, there are a few (and very few) “families” out there that aren’t fucked up, well at least not as fucked up as most.. but in reality I can think of only very few people that are truly happy and get along with mostly everyone.

Pessimists and religious nuts are the worst. It’s either “everything sucks” or “everything but what I think is wrong.” Those people are truly unhappy and will always be that way. I feel sorry for them in some extent, but seriously? I mean, c’mon why is YOUR life so much shittier than everyone elses? In comparison, the rich CEO and the Middle Class Blue Collar are the same people. they have the same family problems, the same nagging mother in law, the same whiny brat kids. Are they really that different?

Every 24 hours we get a new chance to change something in our lives. We complain about how much our life sucks, yet every fuckin minute we are given the opportunity to change a variable to make it different. not necessarily better or worse, just different. People that build these CONSTANTS in their life as some form of definition or law to guide them through a sheltered and “happy life” are missing the point. Its the setting of these CONSTANT variables that makes us not be able to cope or coexist with eacother.

Take for example religion. yeah, yeah, I know, bashing religion again, but whatever..
Religion has defined that there is an ultimate creator and that we must obey it. thats a constant. (RULER = ‘”GOD”, or RULER=”JESUS”, or RULER=”GANESHA”) I’m going to geek out here for a minute, but if we look at life as an application or program we are in, it has a given set of variables. Some are constants, some are global, some are sessions. So we’ve already defined what RULER is, but that shouldnt be a constant. It’s a personal variable, it should only apply to YOU and YOUR object in the program. A true constant is that of the sun. It is a known fact that the sun will rise. That is a pure, global constant. You can’t change it, you can’t alter it, it affects everything in the program.

Now, if we apply this RULER variable as a session(personal) and not a constant, maybe we could co exist. then my variables dont overlap yours.

So, how do we simply co-exist? How do we find “the one” or how do we find a way for nations to peacefully live together?
I’m going to draw this line right back to where I thought in the very beginning. You have to love yourself first. before anyone can live together, or be neighbors, or share, or anything, you have to be able to stand on your own 2 feet, take responsibility, and be independent. If we move from being 100% dependant on our moms and dads from time of birth, then we walk into relationships being needy and dependent. When 2 needy and dependant people get together, it either self destructs or it spawns an even more needy and dependant being. (in some cases, both happens) How can that cycle ever lead to anything but entropy?

I’m happy being alone for the first time in my life. I am free to be in my house and do as I please. I set my own rules, and define my own variables. It’s MY home. Had I not come to this point in my life, I don’t think I would have been able to have a healthy relationship with anyone. Looking back at my past relationships, I see the failing points. Sometimes it was me, sometimes it was her, sometimes it was both. We simply could not co-exist. We each had something that was more important than the sum of the relationship. That in turn caused each to fail.

But, alas, I am here now. I can be happy and coexist with someone. I am more than grateful for her too. I really do look forward to seeing where this goes, as I feel like we both seem to understand the same things and hold the same ideals.