I’m really at a loss for words on how to describe someone, who seems to believe they can lay all blame on other parties. For 4 years, I catered to someone’s every whim, in the end (and for the better) only to be thrown out like yesterday’s trash. I tolerated lies, I tolerated insecurities to the point of madness, I tolerated laziness, and most of all i tolerated the constant and unending lack of respect.
I really could care less, It’s not a big deal. I am a happier person, and my life is going wonderfully, finally. My intentions in writing this are not to disgrace or say foul against someone, but rather open a door for someone else to see and maybe they in turn won’t do the same thing to someone else.
Using colorful adjectives, and blatant lies (read: inserted words) will never prove a point. In the end its all hearsay. We both know who is right and who is wrong. the problem lies in the fact that we don’t agree on who was wrong. It’s comforting to know that at every attempt to help someone in need, It was seen as a gesture of control. If the sarcasm isn’t thick enough for you, please read that again. For for years I watched someone flounder about her life, with no clear idea of where she was going. She gave up on dreams when I pushed her to follow them, she settled in an easy life when she knew she wanted more. It pained me every day to see someone I cared for fall apart, by simple inaction to follow herself and follow her own heart. In the end all the blame of wasted years was blamed on me as a controlling bastard. Whats so lovely is that I never once told her what she could or couldn’t do. I have a respect for all people, and she never once saw this side of me.
Sitting by every day seeing someone in her mind that was an ill portrayal of myself, cause her to follow some line into god only knows what.
Here’s the final lay down: I’m over it, her, and the miserable life I pretended to enjoy for so long. I was over it long ago, but for some reaosn I wished for some sort of emerging friendship which never came. I now see the person I literally “dealt” with for so long. I dealt with like a cancer on the side. Its finally gone. The misery and the cold heartless life.
To her: Good riddance. I hope you find joy in your lackluster life of fear and loneliness. Maybe for once in your life you should stand up and take some personal responsibility. Understand that YOU are the one that took 5 years to get a 4 year degree, Understand that YOU are the one that never followed through with your dreams you held onto for years. understand that YOU are the single, lonely, fearful, teacher that you strived for so long to NOT BE. I did nothing but keep the lights on in the house while you wasted away. Do not blame me for your inabilities and failure as a person. I am not the one who made your decisions.
The single greatest feeling I have right now is the fact that I am no longer with such a cold and miserable person. someone akin to “Death” himself.For this person, I have no pity.
The life I now know i was missing is here. I am uniquely happy.
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